Kids Talk

Greg & Mary Ellen Newell gnewell@en.com
Fri, 20 Dec 1996 00:58:41 +0000


On Wed, 18 Dec 1996 15:23:23 -0800 (PST), Ronald R Shiflet wrote:

>Everybody,
>
>My Brother-in-law Sent this to me I thought you might enjoy it.
>
>>>  Kids say the darnedest things.  Some grade school teachers must
>>>  agree with that, because they keep journals of amusing things
>>>  their students have written in papers.  Here are a few examples:
>
>>>    - The future of "I give" is "I take."
>>>
>>>    - The parts of speech are lungs and air.
>>>
>>>    - The inhabitants of Moscow are called Mosquitoes.
>>>
>>>    - A census taker is man who goes from house to house
>>>      increasing the population.
>>>
>>>    - Water is composed of two gins. Oxygin and hydrogin. Oxygin is
>>pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water.
>>>
>>>    - (Define H2O and CO2.)  H2O is hot water and CO2 is cold
>>>      water.
>>>
>>>    - A virgin forest is a forest where the hand of man has never set
>>foot.
>>>
>>>    - The general direction of the Alps is straight up.
>>>
>>>    - A city purifies its water supply by filtering the water then
>>forcing it through an aviator.
>>>
>>>    - Most of the houses in France are made of plaster of Paris.
>>>
>>>    - The people who followed the Lord were called the 12 opossums.
>>>
>>>    - The spinal column is a long bunch of bones. The head sits on
>>the top and you sit on the bottom.
>>>
>>>    - We do not raise silk worms in the United States, because we get
>>>      our silk from rayon. He is a larger worm and gives more silk.
>>>
>>>    - One of the main causes of dust is janitors.
>>>
>>>    - A scout obeys all to whom obedience is due and respects all
>>duly constipated authorities.
>>>
>>>    - One by-product of raising cattle is calves.
>>>
>>>    - To prevent head colds, use an agonizer to spray into the nose
>>until it drips into the throat.
>>>
>>>    - The four seasons are salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
>>>
>>>    - The climate is hottest next to the Creator.
>>>
>>>    - Oliver Cromwell had a large red nose, but under it were
>>>      deeply religious feelings.
>>>
>>>    - The word trousers is an uncommon noun because it is singular at
>>>      the top and plural at the bottom.
>>>
>>>    - Syntax is all the money collected at the church from sinners.
>>>
>>>    - The blood circulates through the body by flowing down one leg
>>and up the other.
>>>
>>>    - In spring, the salmon swim upstream to spoon.
>>>
>>>    - Iron was discovered because someone smelt it.
>>>
>>>    - In the middle of the 18th century, all the morons moved to
>>Utah.
>>>
>>>    - A person should take a bath once in the summer, not so often in
>>the  winter.
>--------- End forwarded message ----------
>--------- End forwarded message ----------

Greg & Mary Ellen Newell
Greg's Piano Forte'
12970 Harlon Ave.
Lakewood, OH 44107

e-mail;
gnewell@en.com	or
dt945@cleveland.freenet.edu




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