<!DOCTYPE HTML PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD HTML 4.0 Transitional//EN"> <HTML><HEAD> <META http-equiv=Content-Type content="text/html; charset=US-ASCII"> <META content="MSHTML 6.00.2900.2627" name=GENERATOR></HEAD> <BODY id=role_body style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #000000; FONT-FAMILY: = Arial" bottomMargin=7 leftMargin=7 topMargin=7 rightMargin=7> <DIV> <DIV>In a message dated 5/31/2005 8:32:29 PM Central Standard Time, wblees@bama.ua.edu writes:</DIV> <BLOCKQUOTE style="PADDING-LEFT: 5px; MARGIN-LEFT: 5px; BORDER-LEFT: blue 2px solid"><= FONT style="BACKGROUND-COLOR: transparent" face=Arial color=#000000 size= =2>You've heard of the Mozart Effect, BUT, have you heard of the ... LISZT EFFECT: Child speaks rapidly and extravagantly, but never really says anything important. BRUCKNER EFFECT: Child speaks very slowly and repeats himself frequently.  Gains reputation for profundity. WAGNER EFFECT: Child becomes a megalomaniac. May eventu= ally marry his sister. MAHLER EFFECT: Child continually screams - at great length and volume - that he's dying. SCHOENBERG EFFECT: Ch= ild never repeats a word until he's used all the other words in his vocabul= ary. Sometimes talks backwards. Eventually, people stop listening to him. Ch= ild blames them for their inability to understand him. BABBITT EFFEC= T: Child gibbers nonsense all the time. Eventually, people stop listening = to him. Child doesn't care because all his playmates think he's cool. IVES EFFECT: the child develops a remarkable ability to carry= on several separate conversations at once. GLASS EFFECT: the child tends to repeat himself over and over and over and over and over and ov= er and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again. STRAVINSKY EFFECT: the child is prone to savage, guttural an= d profane outbursts that often lead to fighting and pandemonium in the preschool. BRAHMS EFFECT: the child is able to speak beautifully as= long as his sentences contain a multiple of three words (3, 6, 9, 12, etc). However, his sentences containing 4 or 8 words are strangely uninspired. AND THEN OF COURSE, THE CAGE EFFECT -- CHILD SAYS NOTHI= NG FOR 4 MINUTES, 33 SECONDS. PREFERRED BY 9 OUT OF 10 CLASSROOM TEACHERS. ----- End forwarded message ----- -- </BLOCKQUOTE></DIV> <DIV></DIV> <DIV> </DIV></BODY></HTML>