free

[Kevin E. Ramsey RPT]

I say let 'em come. I need the target practice. MORE TARGETS! MORE
TARGETS!!!!
----- Original Message -----
From: "Richard Moody" <remoody@midstatesd.net>
To: <pianotech@ptg.org>
Sent: Saturday, November 18, 2000 4:21 AM
Subject: free


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> >
> > NOTICE OF REVOCATION OF INDEPENDENCE
> >
> > >
> > > To the citizens of the United States of America,
> > > In the light of your failure to elect a President of the USA and thus
> > >to
> > > govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your
> > > independence, effective today.
>
>
> DUH. . !   ?     We HAVE an *elected* president.  His term doesn't expire
> until some where around Jan 20th 2001, well, --- after the Super Bowl.
> Sorry,  you have to wait until then and already the line is very long
> including two Grand mothers who were DAR.   rip
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> > >
> > > Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical
duties
> > >
> > >over
> > >all states, commonwealths and other territories.  Except Utah, which
she
> > >
> > >does not fancy.  Your new prime minister (The rt. hon. Tony Blair, MP
> > >for
> > >the 97.85% of you who have until now been unaware that there is a world
> > >outside your borders) will appoint a minister for America without the
> > >need
> > >for further elections.  Congress and the Senate will be disbanded.  A
> > >questionnaire will be circulated next year to determine whether any of
> > >you noticed.
> > >
> > >To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following
> > >rules are introduced with immediate effect:
> > >
> > >1. You should look up "revocation" in the Oxford English Dictionary.
> > >Then look up "aluminium".  Check the pronunciation guide.  You will be
> > >amazed at
> > >just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it.  Generally, you should
> > >raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels.  Look up "vocabulary".
> > >Using the same twenty seven words interspersed with filler noises such
> > >as "like" and you know" is an unacceptable and inefficient form of
> > >communication.  Look up "interspersed".
> > > 2. There is no such thing as "US English".  We will let Microsoft know
> > >on your behalf.
> > > 3. You should learn to distinguish the English and Australian accents.
> > >It really isn't that hard.
> > > 4. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as
> > >the good guys.
> > > 5. You should relearn your original national anthem, "God Save The
> > >Queen", but only after fully carrying out task 1.  We would not want
you
> > >to get confused and give up half way through.
> > >6. You should stop playing American "football".  There is only one kind
> > >of
> > > football.  What you refer to as American "football" is not a very good
> > >game.
> > >The 2.15% of you who are aware that there is a world outside your
> > >borders
> > > may have noticed that no one else plays "American" football.  You will
> > >no
> > > longer be allowed to play it, and should instead play proper football.
> > >Initially, it would be best if you played with the girls.  It is a
> > >difficult game.  Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to
> > >play rugby (which is similar to American "football", but does not
> > >involve stopping for  a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full
kevlar
> > >body armour like nancies).  We are hoping to get together at least a US
> > >rugby sevens side by 2005.
> > >7. You should declare war on Quebec and France, using nuclear weapons
if
> > >they give you any merde.  The 98.85% of you who were not aware that
here
> > >is
> > > a world outside your borders should count yourselves lucky.  The
> > >Russians
> > >have never been the bad guys.  "Merde" is French for "shit".
> > >8. July 4th is no longer a public holiday.  November 8th will be a new
> > >national holiday, but only in England.  It will be called "Indecisive
> > >Day".
> > > 9. All American cars are hereby banned.  They are crap and it is for
> > >your own good.  When we show you German cars, you will understand what
> > >we mean.
> > >10. Please tell us who killed JFK.  It's been driving us crazy.
> > >
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