<!DOCTYPE HTML PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD HTML 4.0 Transitional//EN"> <HTML><HEAD> <META HTTP-EQUIV="Content-Type" CONTENT="text/html; charset=us-ascii"> <TITLE>Message</TITLE> <META content="MSHTML 6.00.2900.2873" name=GENERATOR></HEAD> <BODY> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2><SPAN class=390391017-19062006>Let's lighten up, people. If you can't follow George's proposed new third commandment, (see end of article), then please take this conversation to a forum where it is appropriate. May I suggest the following Google search:</SPAN></FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2><SPAN class=390391017-19062006><A href="http://groups.google.com/groups/search?q=god+male+female">http://groups.google.com/groups/search?q=god+male+female</A></SPAN></FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2><SPAN class=390391017-19062006></SPAN></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2><SPAN class=390391017-19062006>=====================================</SPAN></FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>GEORGE CARLIN ON THE 10 COMMANDMENTS<BR>from "Complaints and Grievances" (HBO special) </FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>Here is my problem with the ten commandments- why exactly are there 10? </FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>You simply do not need ten. The list of ten commandments was artificially and deliberately inflated to get it up to ten. Here's what happened: </FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>About 5,000 years ago a bunch of religious and political hustlers got together to try to figure out how to control people and keep them in line. They knew people were basically stupid and would believe anything they were told, so they announced that God had given them some commandments, up on a mountain, when no one was around.</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>Well let me ask you this- when they were making this s**t up, why did they pick 10? Why not 9 or 11? I'll tell you why- because 10 sounds official. Ten sounds important! Ten is the basis for the decimal system, it's a decade, it's a psychologically satisfying number (the top ten, the ten most wanted, the ten best dressed). So having ten commandments was really a marketing decision! It is clearly a b******t list. It's a political document artificially inflated to sell better. I will now show you how you can reduce the number of commandments and come up with a list that's a little more workable and logical. I am going to use the Roman Catholic version because those were the ones I was taught as a little boy.</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>Let's start with the first three: </FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>I AM THE LORD THY GOD THOU SHALT NOT HAVE STRANGE GODS BEFORE ME</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>THOU SHALT NOT TAKE THE NAME OF THE LORD THY GOD IN VAIN</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>THOU SHALT KEEP HOLY THE SABBATH</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>Right off the bat the first three are pure b******t. Sabbath day? Lord's name? strange gods? Spooky language! Designed to scare and control primitive people. In no way does superstitious nonsense like this apply to the lives of intelligent civilized humans in the 21st century. So now we're down to 7. Next:</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>HONOR THY FATHER AND MOTHER</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>Obedience, respect for authority. Just another name for controlling people. The truth is that obedience and respect shouldn't be automatic. They should be earned and based on the parent's performance. Some parents deserve respect, but most of them don't, period. You're down to six.</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>Now in the interest of logic, something religion is very uncomfortable with, we're going to jump around the list a little bit.</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>THOU SHALT NOT STEAL</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>THOU SHALT NOT BEAR FALSE WITNESS</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>Stealing and lying. Well actually, these two both prohibit the same kind of behavior- dishonesty. So you don't really need two you combine them and call the commandment "thou shalt not be dishonest". And suddenly you're down to 5.</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>And as long as we're combining I have two others that belong together:</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>THOU SHALT NOT COMMIT ADULTERY</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>THOU SHALT NOT COVET THY NEIGHBOR'S WIFE</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>Once again, these two prohibit the same type of behavior. In this case it is marital infidelity. The difference is- coveting takes place in the mind. But I don't think you should outlaw fantasizing about someone else's wife because what is a guy gonna think about when he's waxing his carrot? But, marital infidelity is a good idea so we're gonna keep this one and call it "thou shalt not be unfaithful". And suddenly we're down to four.</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>But when you think about it, honesty and infidelity are really part of the same overall value so, in truth, you could combine the two honesty commandments with the two fidelity commandments and give them simpler language, positive language instead of negative language and call the whole thing "thou shalt always be honest and faithful" and we're down to 3.</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>THOU SHALT NOT COVET THY NEIGHBOR"S GOODS</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>This one is just plain f****n' stupid. Coveting your neighbor's goods is what keeps the economy going! Your neighbor gets a vibrator that plays "o come o ye faithful", and you want one too! Coveting creates jobs, so leave it alone. You throw out coveting and you're down to 2 now- the big honesty and fidelity commandment and the one we haven't talked about yet:</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>THOU SHALT NOT KILL</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>Murder. But when you think about it, religion has never really had a big problem with murder. More people have been killed in the name of god than for any other reason. All you have to do is look at Northern Ireland, Cashmere, the Inquisition, the Crusades, and the World Trade Center to see how seriously the religious folks take thou shalt not kill. The more devout they are, the more they see murder as being negotiable. It depends on who's doin the killin' and who's gettin' killed. So, with all of this in mind, I give you my revised list of the two commandments:</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>Thou shalt always be honest and faithful to the provider of thy nookie.</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>&</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>Thou shalt try real hard not to kill anyone, unless of course they pray to a different invisible man than you.</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>Two is all you need; Moses could have carried them down the hill in his f****n' pocket. I wouldn't mind those folks in Alabama posting them on the courthouse wall, as long as they provided one additional commandment:</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>Thou shalt keep thy religion to thyself.</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2></FONT> </DIV> <BLOCKQUOTE dir=ltr style="MARGIN-RIGHT: 0px"> <DIV></DIV> <DIV class=OutlookMessageHeader lang=en-us dir=ltr align=left><FONT face=Tahoma size=2>-----Original Message-----<BR><B>From:</B> pianotech-bounces@ptg.org [mailto:pianotech-bounces@ptg.org] <B>On Behalf Of </B>pianotune05@comcast.net<BR><B>Sent:</B> Monday, June 19, 2006 9:21 AM<BR><B>To:</B> Pianotech List<BR><B>Subject:</B> Re: Gender of God, and other piano-realted stuff.....<BR><BR></FONT></DIV> <DIV>Definitly faith I would attest.  Now we're getting into even deeper theological topics which I know I'd get in trouble for discussing because they're not piano related.  Someone else who's been a piano tech longer than I who isn't new might get by with it.:)  All I will say is that discussing those who wrote Scripture then opens the door for the topic, then who truly wrote the Bible the people who thought the earth was flat or God inspiring them?  I know the answer, but I'll leave it for another list.</DIV> <DIV>Marshall</DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <BLOCKQUOTE style="PADDING-LEFT: 5px; MARGIN-LEFT: 5px; BORDER-LEFT: #1010ff 2px solid">-------------- Original message -------------- <BR>From: "Robin Blankenship" <tunerdude@comcast.net> <BR> <META content="MSHTML 6.00.2900.2912" name=GENERATOR> <STYLE></STYLE> <DIV>What evidence do you have for that assertion, Luis? Or, is this statement just to be taken on faith............</DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV>Robin Blankenship</DIV> <BLOCKQUOTE style="PADDING-RIGHT: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 5px; MARGIN-LEFT: 5px; BORDER-LEFT: #000000 2px solid; MARGIN-RIGHT: 0px"> <DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial">----- Original Message ----- </DIV> <DIV style="BACKGROUND: #e4e4e4; FONT: 10pt arial; font-color: black"><B>From:</B> <A title=LuisGalvez@aol.com href="mailto:LuisGalvez@aol.com">LuisGalvez@aol.com</A> </DIV> <DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial"><B>To:</B> <A title=pianotech@ptg.org href="mailto:pianotech@ptg.org">pianotech@ptg.org</A> </DIV> <DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial"><B>Sent:</B> Monday, June 19, 2006 11:23 AM</DIV> <DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial"><B>Subject:</B> Re: Gender of God, and other piano-realted stuff.....</DIV> <DIV><BR></DIV><FONT id=role_document face=Arial color=#000000 size=2> <DIV>Remember that the people who wrote the bible thought the earth was flat.</DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT lang=0 face="Bodoni MT" size=2 PTSIZE="10" FAMILY="SERIF">Luis Antonio Galvez-Alcantara "He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up."<BR><A href="http://www.tenors.net/">www.tenors.net</A> </FONT></DIV></FONT> <P> <HR> <P></P>No virus found in this incoming message.<BR>Checked by AVG Free Edition.<BR>Version: 7.1.394 / Virus Database: 268.9.0/368 - Release Date: 6/16/2006<BR></BLOCKQUOTE></BLOCKQUOTE><BR> <P><FONT size=2>--<BR>No virus found in this incoming message.<BR>Checked by AVG Free Edition.<BR>Version: 7.1.394 / Virus Database: 268.9.0/368 - Release Date: 6/16/2006<BR></FONT></P> <P><FONT face=Arial size=2></FONT></P></BLOCKQUOTE></BODY></HTML>