<!DOCTYPE HTML PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD HTML 4.0 Transitional//EN"> <HTML><HEAD> <META http-equiv=Content-Type content="text/html; = charset=iso-8859-1"> <META content="MSHTML 6.00.2600.0" name=GENERATOR> <STYLE></STYLE> </HEAD> <BODY bgColor=#ffffff> <DIV><FONT size=2> <DIV>> To link an honest questioner (me) to "PETA freaks" looks = way too reactionary, from my point<BR>> of view.  I hope no one tries to = make a joke of it, as you would like to.<BR>> <BR>> Regards,<BR>> Clyde<BR></DIV> <DIV>Ha!  Sorry, it was pretty funny to me.  Still is.  = PETA was only an example, (one of my favorite organizations to make fun of), not = a comparison to you personally.</DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><STRONG><FONT size=3>LET'S SEE, MAYBE I CAN THINK OF A BETTER JOKE...</FONT></STRONG>  <FONT face="MS Song" color=#0000ff size=3><STRONG>(Late night piano tech stand-up = routine)</STRONG></FONT></DIV> <DIV><STRONG><FONT face="Lucida Sans" color=#008000 size=3>And = now, from the fabulous musical comedy club in Las Vegas....</FONT></STRONG></DIV> <DIV><STRONG><FONT color=#ff0000>==================== ========================== ========================== =================</FONT></STRONG></DIV>= <DIV><FONT size=3>Good evening ladies and gentlemen, I just flew in = from the PTG convention and boy are my arms tired!  So how many techs do we have = from out of town?</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>I understand some of you have been concerned about = recycling the lead from old keys.  I heard an interesting story about = this recently:</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>Two piano technicians walk into a bar.</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>One says to the other, "say, what do you do with old = key leads?"</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>Overhearing the conversation the bar = tender walks over and says, "No problem, just bring them here"</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>"Bring them here?  Why?"  the tech asks.</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>"Because, people are always looking for a little = heavy action around here when getting hammered".</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#000080 size=3>(Bada boom bada = psheeee!)</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>Hey, ivorysemble that remark!  But seriously folks...  Without physically removing the leads is there a simpler = way to make a piano lighter? Sure, just start playing heavy = metal.  That way you empty out all the music.</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#000080 size=3>(Badump boom psheee!)</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>But really, we should all take recycling serious.  And we really ought to be recycling old = strings.  The single strings can become unicycles, the double strings can become = bicycles, and the three string notes can become tricycles.</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#000080 size=3>(Badabump bada = pshechee!)</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>Tuning pins, now there's a thing that can be = reused.  After all, with so many years of turning it's time to turn them into = something else.  Speaking of turning, what's the easiest way = to tune unequal temperament?  Use random string and pin sizes.</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#000080 size=3>(Bah dump bada boom = psheeee!)</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>Now plastic, there's a new one.  You know, = a lot of companies are starting to use plastic parts instead of = wood... you see this way you save conventional forests.  Instead you cut down = plastic forests, like the ones where artificial Christmas trees come from.</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#000080 size=3>(Bada dump bada dump bada = phseeee!)</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>But seriously, a lot of wood goes into the = construction of a piano.  And there are limited resources too.  And some of = those parts don't even come from trees.  Let's see, you've got butts, legs, = heals, heads, cheeks, nose bolts... there are a lot of human aspects to this business.  And sometimes these parts go bad.  Like Veneer for example.  If it gets wet and peels it will develop = veneerial disease!</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#000080 size=3>(Bada boom bada = psheeee!)</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>Of course we do have to be careful not to be too = wasteful in piano construction.  Even our animal friends give it up for = our enjoyment.  Buckskin leather for example is used extensively.  And the hide glue that the Jell-O people = sacrificed for us.  And how about the sheep that gave us felt for which there = otherwise would be no pianos.  Some of our animal friends aren't able to help = us anymore however.  For example we aren't aloud to use ivory for keys = anymore because of the endangered elephants.  Perhaps the most = abuse however is to be blamed on Wurlitzer for their extensive use of = naugahide.  Why today there are almost no naugas left and rumor has it that the = avocado green ones are now extinct.  Now companies all over the world are = being forced to use "imitation Nauga".</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#000080 size=3>(Badump boom psheee!)</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><STRONG>Thank you ladies and gentleman, you have been a wonderful audience!</STRONG></DIV> <DIV><STRONG><FONT color=#008000>(Applause, applause, applause!)</FONT></STRONG></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV>Rob Goodale, RPT</DIV> <DIV>Las Vegas, NV</DIV></FONT></DIV></BODY></HTML>