<!DOCTYPE HTML PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD W3 HTML//EN"> <HTML> <HEAD> <META content=text/html;charset=iso-8859-1 = http-equiv=Content-Type> <META content='"MSHTML 4.72.3509.100"' name=GENERATOR> </HEAD> <BODY bgColor=#ffffff> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#000000 size=2> <DIV><FONT size=3>I was sitting at my desk one day when I remembered I = had to make a phone call, I found the phone number and dialled it.</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>An ill-humoured guy answered saying = "Hello" ?</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>Courteously I said  "Good afternoon, may I = speak to Andrea Jaramillo ?"<BR> </FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>The guy just hanged on me. I could not believe = anybody could be that rude.<BR></FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>I checked again the number and dialled again, = realising that the number I dialled first had the last two digits = inverted.</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3><BR>After speaking to Andrea I kept watching the = wrong number I had on my desk, thinking on the ruddness of the owner.</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>I decided to call again and teach him a = lesson.</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>When the same voice answered I told him "You = are an SOB.." and hanged up.Immediately I wrote next to his phone number = the word SOB making a note to call him every couple of weeks when I was more = stressed paying my bills or after a bad day, I would just dial his number tell = him "You are an SOB" and hang up. It really made me feel much = better <BR><BR> After several months, our local Phone Company introduced = the ID call service which let you know where the call is originated, what made = me very sad. I had to stop calling the SOB. Then an Idea struck my = mind.</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>I dialled his number, listened to his voice saying "Hello" and faking mine I said.</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>"Hello, I am calling you from CANTV (our local = phone co.) Customer Service Department to see if you have our ID Call Service."</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>He answered as always, "No" and hanged the = phone. What a relief !</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>Immediately I dialled again and said "That is = because you are an SOB"<BR></FONT><FONT size=3><BR> The reason I am = telling you all these is to show you that if there is really something that bothers = you, there is always something to do about it. Simply dial 58 (2) 8234623 and = say " You are an SOB"</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3> (Keep reading... it gets better still . . .) </FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3><BR> I went to the the market, and I was = waiting for a place to park when I noticed an old lady which was leaving. She got into = her car, and I parked near her waiting for the place. The old lady was = taking an awful long time to leave, I even began to think that she would never leave.</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>Finally her car started moving, and in consideration = to her old age and driving skills I reversed a little to give her more = manoeuvring space. And I thought, Great, at last she is leaving.<BR></FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>Not a second has passed when a black Camaro appeared = and bulleted in the empty space I was waiting for...<BR></FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>I honked my horn, and leaning outside my window I = told him. "Hey, you can´t do that. I was here = first.."</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>The guy simply got down, locked the car and left, = completely ignoring me..</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>Now I was really P.O... and I thought, this guy is a = total SOB.. surely there are lots of them...</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>That is when I noticed on the back window there was = a "FOR SALE" sign.  I wrote down the phone number and = looked for another parking space...<BR></FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>A couple of days later, I was sitting at my desk = again and I was just hanging up after speaking to the first SOB. very easy to call = now after I introduced his number in my phone memory and tagging the button SOB. = and I thought, "Now I should call the Camaro guy too"</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>I dialled the second number and after he answered :</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>"Am I speaking to the FOR SALE Camaro owner ? I = said </FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>"Yes, how can I help you ?" he said = </FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>"Could you tell me where can I see it ?" I = said</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>"Yes, I live at Carrera 45 with 34st. west on = the Yellow house, and the car is parked right at the front. he said </FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>"And what is your name ?" I = said</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>"My name is Eduardo Perez" said the = guy</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>"What is the best time to find you there = ?" I said</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>"Always in the evenings" he said = "</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>"Now listen Eduardo, may I tell you something else.."</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3><BR> Yes</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>" Eduardo, you are an SOB" and I hanged up.</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3><BR>After doing that I added the phone number to the = memory and tagged it SOB2</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3><BR>Now I was getting the feeling that everything = was just working fine for me.</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>But suddenly I realised I had a problem. Now I had = two SOB´s to call instead of one.</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>Several month went by, with me calling them from = time to time and the fun was wearing off, so I decided to put an end to this newly = created problem for which I thought of a great solution:</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>In first place I called SOB1 </FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>Of course, he answered in his rude manner. and I = told him </FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>"You are an SOB" but I did not hang this = time <BR><BR>He said " Are you still there ?"</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>and I answered " Yes"</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>He the said "Stop calling me"</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>I said " Not a chance"<BR></FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>He said: " what´s your name @#|@# ?"</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3><BR>I replied " Eduardo Perez" = <BR><BR> Where do you live ?</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>I answered"Carrera 45 with   34st. = West, in a Yellow house with a black Camaro parked at front" </FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>I heard his voice saying " Now you wait for me = @#|@# I am going right now, and better start saying your prayers ?<BR><BR> I = answered UUUYY, how scary you SOB, and hanged up.</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3><BR>Immediately I called SOB2</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>Hello SOB</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>He answered " If I ever find = you...."</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>and I replied " No need to SOB. I am heading = now for your place and I intend to beat the sh... out of you". and hanged up.</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>Great..</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>Now I called the Police station and notified them = that I was Eduardo Perez  at Carrera 45 with 34st west and my Gay boyfriend = was coming to kill me for being unfaithful<BR><BR> Then I called a National TV = network and told them to go to that address to witness a major Gang = war<BR></FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>After that I took my car and went there to watch the = show</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3><BR> IT REALLY WAS GLORIOUS !!!</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>Imagine, watching two SOB´s striking, kicking = and insulting each other in front of six police cars and a TVnetwork = chopper. Was the best experience in my life.</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>Elian Degen..</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT>.</DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT>.</DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT>.</DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT>.</DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT>.</DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT>.</DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT>.</DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT>.</DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT>.</DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>.</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT size=3>A nice April fool days to all</FONT></DIV></FONT></DIV></BODY></HTML>