Is it just me?

[Ron Nossaman]

At 07:50 AM 3/14/96 -0700, you wrote:

>Others, not so musically endowed, seem to find it necessary to SHOUT
>at me or others, as if they are in the presence of someone who is hard
>of hearing. I wish during these times they would at least say, "WOULD
>YOU LIKE A CUP OF COFFEE?" Instead, and inevitably, it's "HOW MUCH
>LONGER ARE YOU GOING TO BE?" This shouting breaks my hypnotic state,
>and I usually respond... "WHAT?"
>

>Aside 2: during a recent concert tuning, one 'new' member of a stage
>crew apparently thought it was 'cute' to whistle the notes that I was
>tuning. I provided a sarcastic smile the first time, then with a
>finger, uh, on my lips to signify "shhh", and finally verbal
>chastising. That *was* three times, right? That particular problem
>won't exist in the future, but I hope no one notices the
>grapefruit-sized dents in the fireproof stage door.
>
>It *is* unfortunate that the fast decay time in the high treble causes
>us to excite the strings more often than lower notes, and that those
>frequencies are often irritating to the point of causing tooth
>fillings to fall out.
>
>So the question(s) then become:
>
>(1) is it that these external noises exist when I'm tuning other
>portions of the piano, and I'm simply tuning them out?
>
>(2) is this a defense mechanism for the listener? They've been putting
>up with MY noise, and finally, even subconsciously, they must do...
>something,,, to preserve their sanity?
>
>(3) is it just me?
>
>Jim Harvey, RPT

>
>
Hi Jim,

Starting with #3 first: Yes, it's just you.

Having gotten that off my chest, I'll confess that it's just me too. You
realize, of course, that "conversation pit" is defined as "anywhere a piano
is being tuned". Also, I have (honestly!) had people offer to confess to
crimes if I would quit making that noise and go away. I have solicited
bribes along those lines in excess of the standard tuning fee, but have
gotten no takers thus far. That was point #2.

Hummers and whistlers are immediately accused of unfair competition, or
clipping, and assessed a fifteen yard penalty. This usually either amuses,
or confuses, them and they see the need to keep quiet and let me work.
Usually, all people need is a mild kick in the slats to get their attention.
There are the more pathological cases however.

I was tuning in a church once and a half dozen persons of the female
persuasion came in, gathered around the piano, and began to all talk at once
about something totally unrelated to either the sanctuary, the piano, or me.
I never did figure out why they picked that particular spot for the debate,
but I tried to tough it out. The louder and faster I beat on the keys, the
louder and faster they talked. Soon I was pounding on the keys so loud and
so fast that I was sure either my finger, or a string was bound to break..
and they were still drowning me out. So I stopped.

It immediately became DEATHLY quiet in the room... two... three... four.
Finally, a meek and vastly apologetic voice came out of the middle of the
pack. "Are we disturbing you?" "Yes ma'm", I said. They left without a
sound, and I finished up in blissful quiet. Sometimes, you get lucky.


>Aside 1: if I'm working with a stage crew, it's at the same area of
>the piano (or within 5 minutes of my finishing) that the stage manager
>requests I stop tuning so the crew can "communicate" (i.e. yell) to
>each other. Up until this point, I've been tuning "in the cracks"
>between their yelling, so I don't know what determines the exact
>moment that something different occurs!

Try "For $75.00 an hour, I'll take a nap if you like". Like I said, first
you have to get their attention.

>"I never met a man I couldn't learn to dislike." - Jim Harvey
    I think I know this guy too.

Hopeless but still fighting,
 Ron Nossaman