Friday - and definitely OFF TOPIC

John R Fortiner pianoserv440@juno.com
Fri, 16 Jul 1999 14:35:10 -0600


I got these from a friend and though to share them with the List.  Please
don't take these as a slap at the greatest nation on the face of the
earth.  Just enjoy the humor to start your weekend.

John R. Fortiner
Billings,MT



**Only in America...
	can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance...

**Only in America...
	are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink...

**Only in America...
	do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back 
	of the store to get their prescriptions.

**Only in America...
	do people order double cheese burgers, a large fry, and 
	a diet coke...

**Only in America...
	do banks leave both doors open & chain the pens to the counters...

**Only in America...
	do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway 
	and leave useless junk in the garage...

**Only in America...
	do we use answering machines to screen calls & then have call 
	waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want 
	to talk to in the first place...

**Only in America...
	do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten & buns in packages of eight..

**Only in America...
	do we use the word "politics" to describe the process so well: 
	"Poli" in latin meaning "many" and 
	"tics" meaning "blood-sucking creatures"...
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