Phone messasge about S&S

[Ron Nossaman]

>"Hi Jim, this is <client> calling. There's something terribly wrong with
>the Steinway to the point where it's really not even playable but it's some
>kind of horrible buzzing sound on many of the keys and it... it almost
>sounds like there's a note sounding through but it's out of tune
>[translation: the note or sound, not the piano] and it certainly isn't the
>one I'm striking; so I don't know what's wrong but it's awful. Thanks. Bye.

* Best evidence: It's not specific to any particular note or partial
thereof, but more general on "many of the keys". First guess: it's
something on the soundboard, or a sympathetic... not necessarily the piano.
First question: has client installed the Nativity set on the top of the
piano, or otherwise physically rearranged the local reality on or around
the piano? First conclusion: It ain't likely to be anything you did. Second
contingency: Random spontaneous glitches utterly dependent on exhaustive
verification that "First question" is demonstrably negative (which I
doubt). Suggestion: Have client empty room of every recently added,
relocated, or otherwise touched portable item and see if the noise
evaporates. Last resort: Offer to drive out at an appropriate rate, both
velocitarially, and remunerationarially, and personally remove the
offending item from the top of the instrument. This sequence, properly
followed, usually results in an aurally perceived blush (over the phone),
and a rather sheepish disclosure that the noise proved to be seasonal
adornment of some sort or another. I love unattended remote service calls,
and the opportunity for the virtual gloat when it works out. If you end up
having to drive out there, at least someone else gets to pay for your (and
their own) education, which ain't a bad deal.


Ron N