tuner's nipple

[Michael Kurta]

Robert -  you are so very clever.  I needed a good laugh and you get the
prize.  Margaret Kurta (tuner spouse, who reads the list). By the way
sympathies to the anonymous sufferer.
----- Original Message -----
From: "Robert Goodale" <rrg@unlv.edu>
To: <pianotech@ptg.org>
Sent: Sunday, April 21, 2002 2:24 PM
Subject: Re: tuner's nipple


> Oh I am so sorry, I mean no disrespect, but if I try to keep a straight
> face my teeth will explode!  You have had me laughing breathless on the
> floor for fifteen minutes, and I still can't stop.  This is absolutely
> perfect for an episode of Seinfeld.  I'm reminded of the one where
> Kramer comes up with the idea of marketing a bra for fat men.  Without
> regard to what I'm sure is a valid and legitimate question, I can't help
> but feel that this is a topic just begging to be made fun of.  Truly you
> already knew this was inevitable when you created a special e-mail
> account just for this question although that in itself makes it more
> funny!  Oh help, where do I start!
>
> Indeed it is a problem when a tooner gets that "not so fresh feeling".
>  Let's see now, there's the "tooner's bra", (Schaff catalog No. TB-1,
> indicate size).  For those who wish to enhance themselves in order to
> look like a more experienced tooner you may opt for the "Wonder Tooner's
> Bra", (No. WTB-1, indicate "desired" size).  Of course another option
> would be to just use the scissors to cut out little nipple peek-a-boo
> holes.  This way we could have the "Best Tooner Nipples" contest at the
> convention banquet. Winners would receive the "Golden Nipple"  If you
> have hairy nipples you could where a genuine fur shirt to conceal them,
> (buckskin of course).  The other extreme is that you could "Toon
> Topless".  This may actually become a great sales promotion so long as
> you don't mind getting calls from "pianos perverts".  You could do
> "Toon-O-Grams" at bachelor parties.  You could tattoo an action model on
> your chest.  Your nipples would be the center pins.  With practice you
> could flex yourself to make a hammer look like it is hitting a string.
>  You could just lubricate your nipples with Protek.  Silicon spray of
> course could be used for... never mind, that one is to obvious!  As long
> as they are out in the wild you might as will install rings that could
> hold your regulating tools.  The rings themselves could be thickness
> gauges, (Catalog No. NG-2).  When struck they would produce a perfect
> A-440.  Don't forget the bumper stickers... "Tooner Tits Make Perfect
> Pitch", (available from the PTG home office).  Every July there would be
> the Nipple issue for the PTG Journal.
>
> Okay, okay, I'll stop already.  I'm truly sorry for you problem but I
> know you saw it coming.  Best of luck on a solution.
>
> Rob Goodale, RPT
> Las Vegas, NV
>
>
> z k wrote:
>
> > Hello!
> >
> > May I  ask a slightly personal question?
> >
> > I have come to believe that there may be a condition that
> > other tuners besides myself may have experienced at one
> > time or another.
> >
> > I will call this condition "Tuner's Nipple".  It is a mild
> > form of "Runners Nipple".
> > I am not making this up :)
> > http://www.robrunslondon.co.uk/RunnersNipple.htm
> >
> > I noticed the nipple on the side of my tuning arm getting
> > itchy. On close inspection I notice some dryness and
> > chaffing. I believe this is arising from a busier schedule
> > than normal for me. When the tuning arm is holding the lever
> > during the process of tuning a vertical the clothing on that
> > side of the body is moved up and away from the body. Each
> > time the lever is manipulated, especially when using the
> > ~jerk~ method, the clothing can rub across the nipple. This
> > can possibly be the cause of irritation and discomfort.
> >
> >
> > Has anyone ever experienced this condition? Please reply
> > privately if you have experienced this and you feel
> > uncomfortable posting that fact on this list.
> > Me? I got a quick, anonymous Hotmail account to post this
> > message.
> >
> > Neeper99
> > shy and easily embarrassed
> >
> > ps: to help alleviate any unsettling visual images this post
> > may have conjured up, I exercise almost daily and am
> > relatively buff for someone with such a sedentary job   :)
>
>
>