Birdcage

[Billbrpt@AOL.COM]

In a message dated 10/13/98 6:59:40 PM Central Daylight Time,
mvanloon@xs4all.nl writes:

<< Eliot,
 Birdcage pianos are pianos, aren't they?
 And who tune pianos?
 Yes, pianotuners.
 And if you want to call yourself a pianotuner, you have to tune those
 monsters if people ask you to.
 Who else would be doing it?
 
 For this time do as Bill Bremmer advises, charge more and use an EDT.>>

Thank you, Michiel.  I don't know Eliot but I'll assume that he is a
technician who is building a business and looking for work.  It is true that
the "birdcage" piano in question is a difficult job.  I would not accept it
myself because of that.  But there most surely was a time when I would have.
I am in a position now to choose which jobs to do and not.  If it were here,
I'd refer or try to help the customer find someone who would have the time,
patience and desire to take the job.

For Eliot, this presents a challenge but also an opportunity to earn more
money than usual.  He needs to make the customer understand that in this case,
premium fees will have to be paid for work that will not be expected to meet
the usual standards and thus cannot be guaranteed.  Even if the tuning really
doesn't hold well and the piano plays poorly, it will still be an adequate
demonstration to the customer that this instrument cannot serve its purpose
and will only cost more money and disappointment.  At this point, the
technician can be of service in advising and finding a suitable replacement in
a new or properly prepared used-reconditioned-rebuilt-restored, etc., one.
The customer could even want to find someone who could restore it to like new
playing condition, regardless of cost.  For this, a nice commission would be
in order.
 
 <>

I admit that the tuning cannot be as accurate this way.  It is to your credit
that you have developed the muting techniques that permit you to get the job
done.  The chipping alternative is the same one I advise to those who cannot
manage to tune a square grand from the front.  Remove the dampers and chipping
permits the technician to at least do *something* for the customer who has
placed trust in him (her).

Chipping might also be a good way to efficiently raise the pitch before doing
a fine tuning in the usual way.  This safes the difficult task of muting to
where it is worth the effort.

Conrad writes:

<<Customer wanted to be able to play it - could I get it running?  I said I'd
give it a try.  No guarantees. 

I spent the entire afternoon regulating and tuning (M3 flat).  When I was
finished the customer almost had tears in her eyes as she took it for a
spin.>>

He answered the call, made the appointment and with the proper caveat to the
customer, he agreed to work for a fee.  What would going to the location,
badmouthing the instrument, calling it "junk" accomplish?  Would one get any
money for that?


Suppose it is untunable and really beyond a reasonable attempt at restoration.
Taking the time to explain all the reasons, to show with a flashlight, to
write the observations down, etc., all earn a handsome service call fee.  If
this consultation takes as long as a tuning, then it should be worth that
price.

<>

Although I'm sure Conrad would not want to tune such a difficult piano every
day, he knows that he doesn't have to.  This is an exception but as Michiel
says,
   <Birdcage pianos are pianos, aren't they?
 And who tune pianos?
 Yes, pianotuners.>

He probably thought he was charging a lot.  But as one RPT once told me, "You
know when they tip that you didn't charge as much as you should have".

<<Birdcages?  Yup, I'll tune them, squares, too.  I'll complain all the way to
the bank.>>

Liberace couldn't have said it better.  I really wish CWRRVP, Jack  Wyatt RPT
were on this List.  He'd talk some plain sense into some of the subscribers at
times.  I remember him saying in his Texas drawl during his class, "If they's
sumpin' y'all don' wan' do then make ya praahce haagh 'nuff so's ya *will*
wan' do it".  Enough said.

Finally, Bob said,

< <To which of the many Historical Teemperamnets do you chip this one?>>

Why would the Helmholtz solution be any better?  

My apologies to anyone who found my analogy between Helmholtz' solution and
Hitler's offensive.  It was not intended that way.  To me, their names both
start with an H, they're both German, they both had a radical monolithical
idea of how to organize a sea of diversity into one unbending rule.  No one
would argue that Hitler was evil and destructive but there was a time when he
held the confidence, trust and enthousiasme of a great many people.

Helmholtz' solution, ET, irrevocably, it seems, changed the sound of music
forever.  His solution has the unwavering, undying loyalty of most of the
world.  I have seen through this hold that his determination and solution have
on virtually all but a small minority of musical society.  I choose to ignore
its mandate.  

The perfection that I see people trying to achieve in the most perfect state
of equality is a self-defeating goal, in my opinion.  I have no argument with
the precision, just what is being achieved so precisely.

To answer Bob's question, it wouldn't make a great amount of difference which
temperament might be chosen, I just wouldn't choose the Helmholtz solution.

Bill Bremmer RPT
Madison, Wisconsin