Kindness, mercy, only slightly piano related, & long

[Joe & Penny Goss]

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Brian,
Thank you for the post. We all need to remember others feelings whether =
they are our customers work pals or other people we come in contact =
with.
See you=20
Mother Goose
  ----- Original Message -----=20
  From: Brian Trout=20
  To: pianotech@ptg.org=20
  Sent: Saturday, December 04, 1999 1:24 PM
  Subject: Kindness, mercy, only slightly piano related, & long


  Hi list,

  I thought I'd share a couple of experiences I had in a rebuilding =
shop, kind of relating to some stringing operations that were happening, =
but more about some events amongst people.

  It's kind of long, and if you're only interested in the technical =
piano stuff, you'll probably want to just hit the delete button.

  Anyway...

  We had an old Kohler & Campbell spinet piano that was getting =
restrung... I know, I know, you don't have to say it... but it was =
getting done anyway.  There was a guy in the shop who normally did just =
basic work, some hardware polishing, and some very basic regulation and =
repairs who normally took care of a lot of the low end work on just such =
type pianos, that we decided might benefit from the experience of =
restringing a piano.  So we let him go at it.  (He had been a helper on =
many restringing projects, so he was quite familiar with the operation.) =
He worked at it for several hours, but ended up misreading the stringing =
scale we had made, and ended up stringing about half of the top section =
wrong.  Well, it was almost his quitting time when he made this =
discovery, and he was very discouraged by it, and didn't want to =
continue with the project.  Since we had a deadline, another tech and I =
decided that we would work diligently for the rest of the day, and =
finish this thing up right.  So we started.  We removed about half of =
the piano wire, and began again.  I started out winding the wire on the =
tuning pins and pounding them in, while my friend and co-worker kept me =
supplied with the appropriate wire.  Everything seemed to be going fine =
until I realized that I had skipped the very first pin I should have =
started on.  :-(  I told him just as soon as I noticed.  He would have =
been perfectly justified if he had read me the riot act, and refused to =
work any farther with me on this project.  He was actually the head of =
the shop at the time, and could probably have required me to fix what I =
had messed up on my own time.  That was a very vulnerable moment for me. =
 I messed up.  I did it wrong.  It was my fault.  What did he do?  He =
very kindly said something like, "well, let's see what we can do..." and =
we proceeded to undo all that we had done, and start over.  We finished =
the job without further incident, and enjoyed each other's company as =
well.  A couple of years later, I reminded him of this whole thing and =
thanked him for his kindness towards me.  He said he didn't even =
remember it.  I did.  I probably will for a long time.

  A couple of years after, another thing happened.  By this time, I was =
in charge of the shop.  There's an older fellow who was (still is) =
working there that has been there for at least 20 years, maybe much =
more.  He's in his 80's, 83 or 84, I think.  Anyway, he's a helper.  =
He's a good worker, and is happiest when he's being useful and helpful.  =
Unfortunately, his eyesight isn't what it used to be and it's sometimes =
hard for him to do the things he used to do so well.  Anyway, we were =
stringing a piano, a grand this time.  We were about 3/4 of the way =
through the plain wire strings when he started having trouble seeing =
which hitch pin the wire was supposed to be wrapped around.  He missed =
the first one, and we caught it right away.  So rather than trying to =
fix that one, I just cut the wire off, and got a fresh piece for another =
string.  It doesn't take long.  I wasn't really upset.  It happens.  But =
after it happened a few more times, he got very discouraged, and said =
"maybe I should just quit, you'd probably be better off without me."  It =
was one of his vulnerable moments.  I suppose I could have told him to =
find something else to do, or told him how incompetent he was, but I =
didn't want to do that.  He's a good worker.  He's a good person.  What =
we did, was, we took a little break.  We had a cup of iced tea.  =
Basically, I told him "everything will be just fine.  We all mess up.  =
It's ok." I told him about the first incident, the one I told you about =
above, and how my other friend was so kind to me.  I told him not to =
worry, and that I appreciated him helping me with the stringing.  We =
went back to work after a few minutes, and he helped me finish without =
another problem of any kind.  I don't remember the piano.  But I do =
remember my friend. =20

  I hope that when you encounter those vulnerable moments in your life, =
whether you're the one who's encountering it in someone else, or whether =
it's you who's vulnerable, I hope that kindness will be with you.  It's =
sometimes easy to say things that are "right" and "true" that can cut to =
the heart of the people we are with, many times, people we love.  We all =
have those vulnerable moments.  They're a part of life.

  Be kind to one another.

  Best wishes to all,

  Brian Trout
  Quarryville, PA
  btrout@desupernet.net


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